I'm dating a model...

You can probably guess that this is gonna be mushy from the title, so anyone who isn't Muff is free to leave now and look at a more interesting, less repetitive page.

Bear with me.

She is pretty. Yesterday at Simone's, we were models together. Basically, Simone overwhelmed us with copious amounts of make-up and made us do poses in the searing heat in her back garden. It was all for her art assignment, with fairy outfits to be photoshopped on later, which would explain why I was bordering on the "Kill me now" and "I might melt soon" sort of attitude basically as soon as we got outside.

One such pose was that we had to pretend we were newly-weds, holding hands and gazing into each ther's eyes. And gosh it was easy. Standing there, holding her hand, and just disappearing into those beautiful blue eyes. The sight is still imprinted on my mind as the most amazing thing I have ever seen. My heart turned to gooey mush as I stared straight into her soul, and I realised how much I loved her. I could easily have stayed there all day, despite the fact that I was topless and barefoot and rapidly getting sunburnt. It was the most gorgeous experience I've ever had. I love her.

Even better than that was that she was a slut fairy. I hope she doesn't kill me for saying this, but those tight leggings and tank top (with the straps off because they weren't allowed to be in the picture) made her look HOT. And I mean SEXY AS.

Wow. She continues to blow my mind...

This sounds bad to begin with but it isn't supposed to be at all...

Okay I admit it...

She is not perfect. Well, not completely. As you'll find out if you read her blog, she has major self-esteem issues, and she doesn't want me to lie to her about her looks.

So, Muffy, you are not perfect. You are not perfect because of your lack of self-esteem. But here's the good news: that is the only reason why you are not perfect. And we can work on that together, no matter what happens in our friendship circle or in the larger world.

I promise. And I love you.

I am Doctor Who

I am an outsider to all species of human living on this planet. I am not fully guy, for reasons that would take too long to explain, but I am not a girl either. I can find faults in both sexes.

Guys are disgusting pigs. And girls are confusing. It seems that every girl's greatest fear is other girls bitching about her, which of course is exactly why bitching is so many girls' favourite thing to do. I mean, ????????. Hence my girlfriend thinks everyone hates her, when in fact she is the most adorable and perfect girl on the planet. Sorry to all my fine female followers, but this is the truth. I love you, princess.

So I have decided that I am in fact Doctor Who. Apparently when my hair is longer I even look a little like him.

Speaking of which, who agrees with Morgan when he says that Doctor Who is a superhero? Comment with your votes...

She is so perfect

I had no idea that one could improve on perfection.

But now I know that miracles do occur. Because today, the most perfect-looking girl in the history of the planet just got even more beautiful.

She had her hair up today, and somehow (don't ask me how) she looked even more angelic and wonderful than she normally does. Perfection has become even more pure and perfect.

And perfection is mine and I love her. She must always have her hair up from now on.